Since parenting is indeed an art it calls for the parent to hone his craft through constant practice and a commitment to learn from his mistakes. I know of many parents who speak of their wonderful relationship with their adolescent child only to hit the ground with a thud when their kid became a teenager. Cultivating your parent teenager relationship is a whole new ball game.
On our parenting path, we need to dismiss the notion that we have to always be right or to pretend that we are right in order to be successful.
To compound matters, the pretend game may appear to work for a period of time when you are dealing with a adolescent. However when they become a teenager such a strategy will cause you to lose credibility.
Whilst teenagers are immature they are not easily tricked. From a young age they have an inbuilt BS detector. It means that as a parent you need to be honest, upfront and willing to learn from your mistakes in order to build your parent teenager relationship.
When you do make a mistake, don't beat yourself up over it. Your teenager is more resilient than you think. They will not be emotionally scarred because you lost your temper, or you had a big fight with your spouse in earshot of your teenager or you were insensitive to them when they were really hurting and so on.
What matters is the overall emotional climate your teenager is exposed to over a period of time. Teenagers or even small children are rarely influenced by single incidents or events unless they happen to be absolutely traumatic.
This is why it is so important to understand your mistakes and accept them as a natural part of your learning curve on your path to becoming a better parent.
With the development of your awareness, you can put into place, measures to avoid repeating the same mistakes. By doing so, you avoid creating a situation that blocks the mental and emotional growth of your teenager. And that all adds up to creating a healthy parent teenager relationship.
By taking an approach whereby you as a parent, apologizes for mistakes made and then follows up with sincere actions to right the wrong done, you are modelling behavior that your teenager can come to adopt in their own life.
Just think of the phrase: "monkey see, monkey do". The most powerful lessons in life are learned through modelling. By being a parent that acknowledges a mistake when you make it and takes appropriate restorative action, you are educating in the most meaningful way. All that means the development of a healthy parent teenager relationship.
On our parenting path, we need to dismiss the notion that we have to always be right or to pretend that we are right in order to be successful.
To compound matters, the pretend game may appear to work for a period of time when you are dealing with a adolescent. However when they become a teenager such a strategy will cause you to lose credibility.
Whilst teenagers are immature they are not easily tricked. From a young age they have an inbuilt BS detector. It means that as a parent you need to be honest, upfront and willing to learn from your mistakes in order to build your parent teenager relationship.
When you do make a mistake, don't beat yourself up over it. Your teenager is more resilient than you think. They will not be emotionally scarred because you lost your temper, or you had a big fight with your spouse in earshot of your teenager or you were insensitive to them when they were really hurting and so on.
What matters is the overall emotional climate your teenager is exposed to over a period of time. Teenagers or even small children are rarely influenced by single incidents or events unless they happen to be absolutely traumatic.
This is why it is so important to understand your mistakes and accept them as a natural part of your learning curve on your path to becoming a better parent.
With the development of your awareness, you can put into place, measures to avoid repeating the same mistakes. By doing so, you avoid creating a situation that blocks the mental and emotional growth of your teenager. And that all adds up to creating a healthy parent teenager relationship.
By taking an approach whereby you as a parent, apologizes for mistakes made and then follows up with sincere actions to right the wrong done, you are modelling behavior that your teenager can come to adopt in their own life.
Just think of the phrase: "monkey see, monkey do". The most powerful lessons in life are learned through modelling. By being a parent that acknowledges a mistake when you make it and takes appropriate restorative action, you are educating in the most meaningful way. All that means the development of a healthy parent teenager relationship.
About the Author:
Are you less than happy in your current parentteen relationship ? If so, you owe it to yourself, yourteen and your family to take responsibility and get parenting expert, Paul Saver's 7 FREE videos. Each video contains a powerful parenting tip that is designed to revolutionize your relationship with yourteen. Just click on the link above.
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